Snow Day!!

This morning we woke up to a beautiful blanket of white snow ice!!  I am going to take full advantage of this day to stay in my PJ's, wrap Christmas presents, watch Christmas movies, drink hot chocolate, build a fire and eat s'mores, listen to Christmas music, and finish up some sewing projects!  :)

Standing at our front door...even the street is covered in ice!

Blanket of ice!

Back yard

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

I am so excited that it's December.  I love the Christmas season.....I love the colors, the music, treats, decorations, family time, and the meaning of what Christmas is all about.  I have been listening to my new Michael Bublé Christmas CD in my car, have Christmas M&M's in the candy dish, and gifts for all of the special people in my life on my mind!  

December always seems to fly by, but I am trying to enjoy every moment of Christmas that I can!  I feel like I am a little behind this year with my decorating, but I got our trees up and finished tonight!  I just love how they turned out.  :)

My red and gold tree with the "pretty" ornaments....this picture doesn't do it justice!  :)

My barbed wire tree with the colorful lights and "fun" ornaments.
This tree is one of my favorite Christmas decorations to put out each year!

Just Because

Teacher inservice is back in full swing, and only a few days left until the students arrive.  We have had many long days of meetings, but I feel that I am getting very close to being "ready" for my new 3rd graders!  :)  Trent has been working a lot lately, as all football coaches in Texas do....he started back on the 1st of August and has gone almost non-stop since then.

Though he has left the house every morning at 6:15 for football practice, worked/meetings during the day, and then returning home after 8:00 in the evening from yet another football practice, Trent still made time to surprise me with these tonight, just because!  One of the MANY reasons why I love him!  How thoughtful!!

What a sweet surprise!

Wreaths

Just over a week ago, I got together with my mom and sisters and we decided to have a Wreath-Making Party! :)  We went to Hobby Lobby and bought all of the supplies we needed, and then spent the evening making wreaths!  We had such a good time, and I LOVE how they all turned out!

Just getting started!

Hard at work!

:)

Kandace's wreath

Kalyn's wreath

Mom's wreath

My wreath

Didn't they all turn out so good?!?!?  :)

Aggie wreaths

5 Years!

Today is our 5 year wedding anniversary!  I can't believe it has already been 5 years, but it has been the best 5 years of my life!  I am so thankful that God chose him to be my husband!  Here's to many more happy years together.  I am looking forward to what God has in store for us in the years to come. :)  Here are a few pictures from our wedding....sorry for the quality, I had to take pictures of photos from our wedding album. :)

The vows

The Kiss....which was totally unexpected!

Mr. & Mrs. Trent Phillips

I still LOVE how gorgeous my cake was! :)

Sweet picture :)

Hellooo Summer!!

It's official....school's out!  Although I still have a couple more days of staff development, school has ended for 2012-2013.  It seems that the year just flew by, which means it must have been a good year!  Maybe 6 years of teaching was the trick!  I truly enjoyed my students this year, and they worked super hard (I may have forced them to)!  Their hard work paid off, as I had only 1 student (out of 40) not pass the dreaded STAAR test.  I was SO EXCITED and proud of my kids to hear this news!  To welcome summer, Trent and I treated ourselves to a Ranger's baseball game. We had awesome seats and enjoyed a night out.

And when I got home from our work day today, this was waiting for me in the back yard!  I'm looking forward to a relaxing summer.  :)

Don't judge my awesome pool!  :) ha

He is My Strength

Just thought I'd share a song that has been on my heart lately.  I feel like we all try to be strong every day, whether it be at work, with family, decisions that must be made, or just life!  It is encouraging to know that God is our strength and He is stronger than we are.  He is my strength and His strength is just enough.  :)  When I start feeling overwhelmed or discouraged, this song is what comes to mind.  I hope it is just as encouraging to you as it is to me!

Results Are In

Yesterday I went in early to give a little blood so that my doctor could do a pregnancy test to see if we are pregnant.  We got the phone call last night around 5:15....negative. :(  It was a very hard night for us, as we were not expecting this news.  Everything had been so positive through the whole process, nothing had gone wrong, I was feeling great-----but it didn't work this time.

Just to give a little background info (for those who are interested).....my doctor retrieved 12 eggs on February 23.  The next day he called to tell us that 6 of the eggs were mature and had fertilized.  This is good news, as it gives us several to work with.  On Thursday, February 28 we had 4 good eggs that had continued to grow, so we had to make the VERY TOUGH decision of transferring 1 embryo or 2. With 1, we had a 60% chance of getting pregnant.  Transferring 2 would give us an 80% chance, but a 50% of twins.  Twins really scared me---can't even imagine what it would be like to have newborn and toddler twins! ha  In the end we decided that God has a plan for us and we would transfer 2, to increase our chances, and let God take care of the number of babies.  Our doctor was very positive about our choice and said he would have done the same.  The transfer went well and then we went home to rest for a few days.  On Friday, our doctor called to say that we had 2 great embryos that he was able to freeze for another time.  This is good news, as we have the option of trying again without going through all of the meds and appointments that we did this time.  It was a long wait from last Thursday to yesterday, but the waiting is over and we now have to make decisions on where to go from here.

The verse that I have constantly reminded myself through this journey was Philippians 4:6-7. "Do not be anxious about anything but in prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Thank you so much for the prayers that you have said for us.  I know that God listened to them and that he knows the desires of our hearts.  However, just as verse 7 says, God is our peace and he is our understanding, even when we don't understand the reasons.  I know He has a plan for us and will continue to guard our hearts and show us where He wants us to go from here.  I'm not sure why we went through everything that we did, just to hear bad news in the end, but I have learned so much and have had to depend on Him for strength through it all.

Please continue to pray for Trent and me as we lean on each other to get through this together.  We will be meeting with our doctor in a couple of weeks to discuss options.  We appreciate all of your prayers and encouraging words that you shared with us this past month.  God has blessed us with a wonderful family and great friends to support us.  We have so much to be thankful for!

Update

I know many of you have probably been anxiously waiting for me to post another update.  I'm sorry that it has taken almost a week to keep you up to date, but life has been pretty busy lately.  Like I mentioned in my previous post, lsat Thursday was my last day to take medicine...YAY!  Thanks to all of you who prayed for me as my body was taking in so many new things---God definitely took care of me and made it an easy few weeks with no complications.

We are almost to the end of this journey, and I am asking for continued prayers in the next week.  This coming week (over the next 12 days) is going to be a very critical time and I know that God is the only one who can control the outcome of it all.  He already knows what waits at the end of this, and I pray that I allow Him to do His work without worrying or stressing over things I can't change or do myself.  If I'm being completely honest, I hope for a healthy baby to be created, and I can only trust that God has that in His plan.

Thank you for all of the encouragement and many prayers that I know you all have said for Trent and me this past month.  We appreciate each of you!!!

Day 12

My appointment this morning went well!!  Today is my last day to take meds, YAY!!  I will have one more injection tonight and then I'm done!  We will be moving forward with the process very soon!  Thank you for your prayers.  Although this part of the journey is ending, we will still need God's help with finishing out the IVF cycle.

In the next few weeks we will do a lot of waiting and I know that it will be very easy for me to get impatient and more anxious than I already am.  Please pray that I will let God take control of every aspect of this process, without worrying about "what else" I can do, or all of the "what if" thoughts that come to mind.  Also continue to pray for Trent, who has been very supportive through everything.  It is hard on him to see everything that I have to do, while there isn't much he can do to help.  He is having to be so patient and understanding!  He is also very busy with baseball this time of year, so that is just one more added pressure that he has to deal with each day, and with each appointment we go to.

Through it all, God is good!

Day 11

After today's appointment, it seems that we will need yet another day of meds before removal day.  I was assured that we are ALMOST THERE and that one more day is probably all we will need.  So....tomorrow will be another day of meds, another appointment, and another morning my students will have a substitute teacher.  But, God is still in control and we are another day closer to the end. Continue to pray as hopefully tomorrow will be my last day of injections, then we will be on to bigger and better days. :)

Day 10

Today is Day 10 of my stimulation medicines.  During an average IVF cycle, this would be the last day to take stim. meds before the eggs are removed.  However, at my doctor appointment this morning I was told that it would be best to do one more day...so onto Day 11 I go.  Thanks for the prayers.  Although I am still continuing another day of medicines, I do believe God worked overnight and there was definitely growth of my follicles from yesterday to today.  This doesn't mean much to you, but we want them to be at least 18 mm before my doctor says we are good for retrieval.  As of today, my follicles are averaging around 14 mm, although one is at 22mm!  I know that God has a plan for me and this cycle, so I am moving forward to see what happens at my appointment tomorrow morning.  Continue to pray that the ultrasound in the morning will show that I am ready to have the eggs removed.  Either way, though, we are one day closer to reaching our goal. :)

On a somewhat different note, tomorrow will be my 4th "school day" in a row to go to appointments, which means my students have had a lot of time with a substitute.  Please pray that they are learning the material that they need this week while I am in and out of their lives, and that things won't be too out of hand when I get there tomorrow afternoon. :)

Say A Prayer

This is going to be a really quick post today, but I thought I would call on all of my prayer warriors to say a specific prayer for me today and tomorrow.
I had an appointment this morning, checking levels in my blood and an ultrasound.  My doctor said that I am a "textbook patient" and that everything seems to be going well!  God is so good!!  However, tomorrow was supposed to be my last day of giving myself the stim. injections....but after looking at the sizes of my follicles as of this morning, they are not quite the size my doctor is wanting just yet for retrieval.  The plan was to stop meds tomorrow night, but now I may have to continue them for a few more days.
Please pray that today, tonight, and tomorrow my follicles are growing and will be ready to stop meds tomorrow when I go back for another check up.  Although I do not want to rush things, and I definitely want everything to be "ready" before moving on with this process, more days of meds means more money spent and more injections...
Thank you all so much for keeping us in your thoughts and prayers!  I am continuing to trust God's plan for us at this time and know He is in control!

One Week Strong

Sorry I haven't posted anything this past week, but there hasn't been much news to share.  Everything has been pretty much the same--same meds, a couple of routine check up/monitoring appointments, etc.  I have been taking the stimulation medicines for a week now, and I am still feeling normal.  God is so good and is completely taking care of me during this time.   I had an appointment on Friday, took some blood to monitor hormone levels and did an ultrasound to be sure everything looks ok internally.  Everything seems fine and the doctor was pleased and said that I look like I'm right on track with this cycle.  We are hopeful that it won't be much longer now!  Continue to keep us in your prayers this week as we continue medications and doctor appointments.  :)

Emotionally... Excited.  Anxious. Physically... Still feeling good! Nothing unusual going on. Mentally... Beginning to get scared of what answers we will be receiving in the next few weeks. Greatest challenge... Trying to get a refill on one of the injection medicines over the weekend. Biggest success... Making it a week giving myself 3-4 shots per day, without much pain at all. My drugs... Menopur. Lupron. Follistim. Doxycycline Monohydrate. Aspirin. In love with... The beautiful weather this afternoon!

Stimulation Medications

Today I started taking my stims (stimulation meds).  These meds are to help grow healthy eggs in the next couple of weeks in order for IVF to be as successful as possible.   I'm in such a good place emotionally.  I can actually say... I'm excited. Who knows how I'll feel later this week when the three shots a day make me feel like a human pincushion!  But for now, I feel good. :)    

My daily meds for the next couple of weeks

Sometime I've let my fear that IVF won't work keep me from embracing this process, and thinking of how God picked me to be strong in this situation.  And how He knows (although I didn't realize it until now) that I can handle this.  Although it still might not work, which will be devastating, I am completely putting my trust in God to give us His healthy child in the end.   Still, I refuse to let my fear overshadow the very exciting possibility that it might will work.  If my mind starts to spiral down a path that is making me feel sad or negative, I pray.  I remind myself that with every shot, we are closer to our baby than we've ever been. I focus on the things that I'm grateful for...like my amazing husband and family, great friends, a healthy body which will hopefully allow me to become pregnant, the great clinic and doctors we have access to, and the encouragement that I receive from all of you. It's amazing how powerful our thoughts can be and how much they dictate how we feel. We certainly can't prevent bad or unfair things from happening in our lives. But we can decide how we want to react to them.

I choose joy and excitement!  Here's to continuing with 3 shots in the stomach, growing lots of healthy eggs these next couple of weeks, and to being one step closer to hearing great news in the end!
Emotionally... Excited. Peaceful. Hopeful. Physically... Feeling great! Nothing unusual going on. Mentally... Thinking a lot about the future and trusting God's plan for our life. Greatest challenge... Mixing and administering first stim shots---thought they might be painful. Biggest success... Giving myself the stim shots, without much pain at all. My drugs... Menopur. Lupron. Follistim. Doxycycline Monohydrate. Aspirin. In love with... My husband for encouraging me and helping me through administering our first stim shots.

Here We Go!

Today I had my pre-stimulation appointment, which is basically where they take blood to check hormone levels and then do another ultrasound to be sure everything internally is still looking good.  Everything went well, so that means on Sunday we will be starting the last phase of injections before "go" day (egg removal day).  This is such exciting news, as this is coming so quickly!  Sunday morning I will start taking two injections in the morning and then another at night, every day.  I will be going back to my doctor every 2-3 days for more blood work and ultrasounds, as I must be monitored until I am "ready".

Thank you so much for praying for us during this time, and also for the encouraging words that we are receiving from so many of you!  I would like to ask you to continue praying for us as we will have a tough week ahead of us (3 injections per day, stimulation meds which could have some side effects).  

I feel like we have done really well with everything so far.  The Lord has given us both a peace and we have felt comforted knowing that we are not alone in our daily walk.  He is always with us, taking care of us.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  -Philippians 4:6-7

We Did It!!

Yesterday we got the first injection under our belt, and today was even better.  With Trent's great encouragement and help with my first shot at giving myself the injection, we did it!!  Trent drew up the medicine (since "it's just like when you vaccinate cows" ha!) as I mentally prepared myself to stick a needle into my stomach.  In the end it really was no big deal.  I did stand for about a minute with the needle almost to my skin, and took several deep breaths before actually doing it.  Regardless, the first one is done and today was a breeze!  I even did the whole process by myself this morning.  I am so thankful that I can do this part of the process so easily, and that God has given me the strength to do it!!  Thank you for your prays and encouragement that you have already expressed so far.  The next step is to continue these daily injections, and then I have a check up appointment next Friday, the 8th.  Please continue to pray for our strength in this journey, and for a healthy baby in the end----which I believe God is already preparing for us.  :)

Supplies for the first day of injections

Trent getting it ready for me

Trent actually took a picture of me when I was giving myself the injection, but I will spare you all of that!!  haha  :)

What We've Been Up To

After a lot of thought and prayers, we have decided to go ahead and post a little bit about what we've been up to lately.  I will go ahead and warn you that this is a pretty long post, and it contains personal thoughts and information.  It's a pretty big deal, but ultimately we know and understand the power of prayer and are trusting that those of you who still actually keep up with my blogs will be faithful to pray for us in the next few weeks.

After almost 2 years of trying to have a baby on our own, on December 21, 2012 we found out that the only chance of getting pregnant would be through IVF (in vitro fertilization), along with the ICSI (intracytoplasmic sperm injection).  Although we were very shocked and saddened to hear of this news, we were quickly given a peace about the whole situation.  We really like our doctor, who is located in Fort Worth, and he made us feel very comfortable and gave us so much hope and positive feedback.  He and his wife actually went through our same situation, twice, and was successful.  It's so nice to know that our doctor has actually gone through the same exact process as we are about to do.  Of course, we walked away that day with so many questions, concerns, and thoughts---the risks, costs, timing, etc---but after a lot of talking and praying we decided pretty quickly that it wasn't really a choice....we HAVE to do it!  God is truly our Provider, Comforter, and life planner, and we are so thankful that we are able to go through this process in order to have a sweet child!

We will be going to numerous appointments, I will be taking LOTS of medications, and plenty of waiting for the right timing along the way.  Trent and I both know that we would do it all in a heartbeat because we have been longing so desperately for a child of our own.  The end result will be TOTALLY worth it!

The rest of my posts will be smaller journal entries that I write along the journey of IVF, mainly so that I will remember everything, but also so that you can keep us in your prayers.

Jan.2, 2013 
Trent and I had our second appointment with our doctor today.  It was basically a consultation.  After a couple of weeks of praying, thinking, and discussing, this appointment was what we needed to do in order to move forward.  We were able to discuss the exact procedures for IVF, and had many questions answered.  All we have to do now is wait....for the first day of my monthly cycle....so we could call and get this going.  We are so thankful God has provided us with a supportive family, friends, and a great doctor for what is soon to come.
Philippians 4:6-7

Jan. 18, 2013 
I don't think I have ever been so anxious and excited for my "monthly visitor" to come.  Finally, she's here and 2 days early!  Woohoo!  God is so good!!  I called and let the nurses know the "good" news, and I was able to set up my baseline ultrasound for Tuesday, Jan. 22.  Can't wait!

Jan. 22, 2013
I'm not going to lie, but yesterday I was really feeling down about what going us with us right now.  It seems that everyday, I learn of someone else who is pregnant---for free!!  It is such a happy and exciting time for my friends and family when they share the news, but it was just really playing a toll on me.  Luckily, my ultrasound was today and it couldn't have been a better appointment.  It was just what I needed to get out of that "funk" I was in.  Praise be to God!  The ultrasound was good and I even got a timeline of the next month---this is really happening!!  In just over a month, I might be pregnant!!!

Jan. 25, 2013
Today was another "big" day for us in our IVF process.  We paid for medications.  Boy, can medicine be expensive!  No wonder I used to think I wanted to be a pharmacist! haha  I will begin taking it next week! :)

Jan, 26, 2013
I received a large package today---my medicines.

This is the box it came in!

I probably spent about 30-45 minutes sorting through everything---pills, syringes, needles, patches, medicines---and reading up on how and when to take them.  Please pray for me as my body will be taking in so many medicines in the next few weeks!

And this is what I will be taking very soon...for someone who doesn't hardly take
tylenol, this is A LOT!!!

Jan. 29, 2013 
Today Trent and I had another appointment.  This one was so that we could be trained on how to give myself daily injections at home.  The nurse went over each medicine I will be taking and showed us how much of each type to use.  She also let me practice filling the syringes with medicines (I know that seems strange, but it's a little scary to think that I am in charge of giving myself the exact amount of medicine at the correct time and in the right way!).  I'm glad Trent was with me because I have a feeling I will be needing him to help remind me of how to do them the right way.
After the teaching session, we went back for my hysteroscopy.  I was REALLY dreading this appointment, as the thought of what what going to be done did not sound appealing!  Basically, this is a procedure where a camera is inserted to look at the lining of my uterus, making sure it is good for holding a pregnancy.  I thought it would be kind of painful, but ultimately it was no big deal.  Our doctor also did a "trial transfer" to be prepared for the actual egg transfer day.  I know that God is watching over me through each of these "scary" appointments, and am sure that He has been my strength!

Jan. 30, 2013
Today I'm just asking for prayers as tomorrow morning I will begin giving myself injections.  I am only starting off with 1 right now, but I know these first few times will be the hardest.  Please pray for strength and comfort throughout the process of injections, as these will continue through the end of February.
Philippians 4:6-7 and Matthew 6:33-34 are on my mind. :)

More Embroidery

Here are some of my latest projects that I have completed:

Luke's 1st Birthday shirt!

For Rhyder Ratliff! 

Vera Bradley cosmetic bag

Vera Bradley cosmetic bags

Scarves

For Cason Beall - Carl Jr. and Kelli's boy

The whole set

I embroidered the name and made the pillow.

Another pillow.

Burp cloths.

For twins girls - Rylee and Aubree

Names on the back of the onesie.